


Hush

by mercurialtaylor



Series: deception [1]
Category: Sanders Sides
Genre: Abuse, Compulsions, Cussing, Emotional Abuse, Injury, M/M, Obsessive Behaviour, Panic, Panic Attacks, it's got a happy ending tho dw
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-03-04
Updated: 2018-03-04
Packaged: 2019-03-27 01:19:38
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 982
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13870035
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mercurialtaylor/pseuds/mercurialtaylor
Summary: He seeps in when Virgil least expects it.





	Hush

He seeps in when Virgil least expects it. On good nights, in the summer sun, when he’s occupied. But sometimes, he makes it easier for Deceit to get in. Late evenings when Virgil is losing his mind, blood on his tongue and head racing.  
He doesn’t notice the door open. Too busy obsessively tracing the life line on his left palm. Watching his nails drag over the skin. And suddenly there’s a gloved hand on his shoulder. Everything stops, for a moment; suddenly, Virgil is breathless, and he must have tensed up, because a second hand rests on his other shoulder, massaging the back of his neck.

_The worst._

“Get out,” he says, voice thick, but still coherent, as of yet. “You aren’t welco-”

“Dear boy,” Deceit replies, words laced with poison, “I’m here to protect you. Something tells me you’re worrying.”

“I don’t need you,” he retorts, but his voice shakes. “St-stay away!”

Ignored. Deceit wraps his arms around the anxious side’s waist, pulling him in. Struggling to draw breath, Virgil claws at the bedsheets, desperate to escape. But he can’t. He’s weak. Weak. Weak. Weak!

“Please,” he whispers.

“Please, what? Help you? Fix you?” He cups Virgil’s chin, forcing him to look at him. “I think not. You’re a little too crazy.”

“No, I’m-” He gasps, trying to find the words. “Patton said I’m-”

“Patton!” He scoffs. “That _idiot_ doesn’t know what he’s talking about.”

“Shut up! He loves me, not like yo-” But he can’t finish. There’s a hand over his mouth, cutting him short.

_No no no no no no no no stop please stop it stop-_

“I don’t love you?” Heart has stopped. Won’t start. Can’t breathe. “I don’t… _love you?"_

_Let me go let me go stop it please-_

“And you told me to shut up? I think you have the wrong idea.” He leans in, unbearably close, and Virgil can feel his breath on his cheek. “ _I_ run the show around here, remember?” He removes his hand. “Don’t forget it.”

Virgil just stares, his whole body shaking and tears running down his face uncontrollably. There are fingernails digging into his back, and, _oh god,_ this is so much worse than before. He was anxious, upset, but nothing compares to this. He’s fucking _terrified_. Seconds away from bawling, and Deceit just scowls at him, as though he’s trying to decide if Virgil is worth his _precious_ time. Or needs to be taught a lesson.

Out of the blue, he pulls Virgil in closer, apparently having decided to give him a second chance. Although he hates himself for it, he relaxes into the hug, trying to find some meagre comfort. His head screams _“No!”_ , trying to remind him who it is that’s comforting him, knowing all he does is lie and manipulate. But he’s shaking so much less already, this false calm residing deep in his stomach and settling there like a shock blanket.

“It’s okay,” Deceit whispers. “I’ll protect you. You’re safe with me, so long as you’re mine.”

He tries to stop himself, but at these words, Virgil pushes himself out of the dark side’s grip. “I will _never_ be yours. Leave me alone.”

“How dare you…?” The fury that fills Deceit’s eyes is enough to let Virgil know he’s fucked up. The shock blanket is gone. There’s a hand around his wrist and another moving fast towards him. He doesn’t even have time to scream.

Half blinded by tears, Virgil watches him storm from his room, cloak billowing behind him. He raises a trembling hand to cheek, finding it warm, even if the stinging wasn’t enough to let him know that there’s definitely a mark there

“Shit,” he murmurs, and he’s gone. Hunched over, head in hands, doing his best to stifle the sobs, but knowing he’s so loud nonetheless. He doesn’t want Deceit to hear him, to come back and mock him for being so _weak_ , tell him he’s worthless and that he needs to learn how to respect those that are better than him - God, he’s so fed up. Tired, angry, and scared. The general unease he feels from being Anxiety is multiplied a thousand times whenever something reminds him, ever so slightly, of the dark side, and when he’s there? It feels as though his body is going to fall apart. It feels everything inside him is out of place, and his thoughts won’t stop screaming at him, screaming danger and terror and reminding him of every bad thing he’s ever done that could get him in trouble.

So when footsteps approach his door, Virgil is sent reeling. He can no longer process what’s around him. His body is so out of his control that he thinks he could die, so unprotected and unsafe, all of this light from the hallway spilling onto him and that _shadow_ and the distinct lack of oxygen and no coherent thought process everything is running into one -

“Breathe.”

That’s not him. That’s _Logan_. Holding him close, running his hands through Virgil’s hair, encouraging him to take in his surroundings.

“You’re safe. He’s not coming back.”

“Lo-” He chokes. “I-”

“Shh, it’s okay.” His voice seems disembodied, so unaware of the world around him as Virgil is right now. “I won’t let him hurt you. Just breathe.”

“I can’t - Logan - help me!” He tries to push himself upwards, but his hands connect with air. The logical side supports him instead, and although his feels as though he’s still drowning, it becomes a little easier to try and tread water.

Eventually, his breathing returns to normal, and he is relaxed in Logan’s arms. There are still fingers carding through his hair, soft and reassuring, and Virgil thinks he could stay this way forever.

“Logan?” he murmurs.

“Mm?”

“Thank you.”

Logan smiles in response, tilting his head to kiss the top of Virgil’s head. “Don’t worry about it.”

**Author's Note:**

> tumblr: mercurialhardy


End file.
